A Heartfelt Apology

(This seems like a long story but keep reading...I love the ending.)

Sunday afternoon, the neighborhood girls and Maddie and Ally were playing outside while I planted flowers in the front. They had been out there a while and had started arguing and bickering back and forth like little girls do sometimes. I finally had to sit them all down and give them my "do unto others as you would have them do unto you" lecture. As the arguing continued, I finally had to send the girls home to give each other a break....before they dispersed, one of the little girl's dog got out of the yard and start to make a break for freedom. As it ran down the street with all the little girls screaming behind him, "Come back!", I yelled (while on the phone, sorry, Amy!)for them to stop because who knows how far they would have run after this dog. Well, they all came back except one, Ilaina.

I get off the phone and tell the one little girl to go and tell her Mom and Dad that their dog is on the run. We think that Ilaina should be back once she realizes that the others are not with her any more. Maddie runs to tell Ilaina's mom that "she is lost" and she and I and Maddie set off to find Ilaina. It hasn't been long so we know that they can't be far but where are they?? Our house isn't far from the big cross over street and as we head that way looking up and down the crossing street, she is still no where to be found. At this point, Maddie has tears in her eyes and she is starting to cry. She is afraid that Ilaina is not coming back and I felt so bad for her. It had only been about 10 minutes but I am sure that is felt like an eternity to Maddie. Ilaina's mom and I separate, I go left and she goes right and Ilaina's Mom finds her down the street between some houses. As Maddie sees her she starts to cry harder....she was just so scared for her friend. We all breath a sigh of relief as Maddie and Ilaina hug.

Once we are back inside the house. I pick Maddie up and squeeze her with all of my might and reassure her that Ilaina is alright but this why we don't run off. I put her down and we head into the kitchen. Maddie grabs a pen and note pad and asks me to sit by her at the table for a little bit. I do and she then asks me how to spell "I am sorry for being mean, Ilaina" I tell her and she runs to put the note into Ilaina's mail box.

I can now see some of what was going through Maddie's head as we searched for Ilaina. She was thinking back to something "mean" she had said to Ilaina before she was "lost" and thought that she may never see her again. What a precious heartfelt apology and how incredible of Maddie to realize the need for it to be said.

How many times have you and I let our anger, pride or grudges get in the way of a heartfelt apology? Many times, I would think....I LOVE learning things from my children. They amaze me with their insights and innocent yet profound actions. I know that this is something that I will take with me from day to day. Never let the moment pass when a heartfelt "I'm sorry" is needed....

Perfection...

I have been thinking a lot about perfection....

It is something that so many people strive for and something that I admit to strive for in some areas of my life. Don't get me wrong, I don't think that this is a bad thing but taken to the extreme it can make a negative impact in your life as well as those around you. Here are my thoughts...

I found myself the other evening worrying about the cleanliness of my house (I don't have a maid) and the laundry that I still needed to do in order to "keep up" with my self-imposed expectations of myself. When my house is a mess and I feel overwhelmed after coming home from work and feeding and bathing the girls and wondering if my house will ever be as clean as I really want, I can get a little cranky. :-) My strive for perfection takes it's toll on my girls and my family. I know that the girls don't care if the laundry is folded and Brian doesn't get upset if the floors are not swept every other day and I hope that my friends wouldn't compare their house to mine if they stopped by and found the counter cluttered with mail I have yet to go through. No one is perfect! (I know that I have said this before but it does us all some good to hear it again, including me!)

In today's world a women has so many roles and with many it is a race to see who can juggle these roles perfectly while attaining the best husband, house, career, children. My heart is torn for those I see striving for this unattainable goal whether they realize it or not and for what I can see in my own life as being too goal-driven. And I admit that it is easy to get caught up in striving for perfection. But no life is perfect and the sooner we all realize this, the more fulfilled we will be. How can we give those around us our ALL when we are so focused on so many "balls in the air." It can be too much and can effect our family as well as our friends even when we think we have it all under control...do we really??

You can spend a lifetime, and, if you're honest with yourself, never once was your work perfect. ~Charlton Heston

I came upon this and I agree. It helps me to realize again that it is not about perfections of our "works" but more about the relationships with others and with God and when we can admit our faults and let others see that we are not perfect, it can bring new meaning into these relationships.

Perfection....now all I have to do is let go, will you?.....

A New Look

I love expressing myself on this blog. It has become something that I look forward to....

I have found that there are a lot of people I know who enjoy this same wonderful way of communicating. And while perusing some of my favorite blog sites, I noticed that one these favorites recieved a "face lift" in the form of an amazing blog design....I clicked on the link to the blog designer jillyblogdesigns.blogspot.com and found a young mom who is using her creativity in a very FUN way. I entered her contest for a free blog design, hoping but never thinking that I would win.

Well......as you can see.....I DID! Thank you, Jill for making my new look suit me to a "T." It is PERFECT!

Pillow Fight!

One minute sweet and innocent.....

The next, all choas begins.....

...watch out, PILLOW FIGHT!

I look up and this is what I see....

(If I look up, this is what I see....two sets of precious eyes on ME!)

I recieve daily devotional emails from an organization, that my sister-in-law told me about, called Proverbs 31 Minitries. While I am not always "current" on reading them, they always speak to me. I read one today that stirred my heart and I wanted to share it with you.

(If I look up, this is what I see....the way my husband looks at me as if we were still newlyweds.)

"Everyday God is there. Everyday we have an opportunity to notice and acknowledge, and see and rejoice. Even when the world is crazy around me, I can still make the choice to see God." When I read this part of the devotion, I knew that this is what my heart needed to hear. I have the CHOICE to notice and acknowledge who God is in my life and all the many ways He is present. If I look down, I see all the negative things in my life, like being frustrated with keeping up with the house and with work, tantrums, feeling overwhelmed with my many "labels". I admit that I have been looking "down" the last few weeks and focusing on the bad. But is it really all THAT bad? The answer is no!

(If I look up, this is what I see....a life FILLED with God's never ending provision and protection for me and my family.)

Yes, life can be hard, frustrating and discouraging but it is most of the time filled with amazing ups and subtle constants that never fade. "Who will notice Me in all of this today? Who will stop for just a moment and see Me? Who will let their soul linger ever so slightly and simply utter an acknowledgement of Me?" I wonder how often I miss these opportunities to look beyond myself and experience God's gifts...There is something everyday that I can acknowledge as being from God and I need to do that. I need to look UP!

(AS I look up, this is what I see....a FEW piles of laundry that I should have done on Sunday but I also see the laughter that kept me from those piles! The goofy picture above is my proof.)

The power of a new tooth.

Last night, we were having dinner and I noticed Maddie had a funny expression on her face. She said, "Oh, this hurts, I think I have some chicken stuck in my tooth." She walks over to my side of the table, opens her mouth and shows me. To my surprise I see a new molar popping up on the left side of her mouth. "Maddie! It is a new tooth" I told her laughing. You would have thought that she just won a lifetime supply of CANDY....her face lit up and her smile illuminated the room. She was so excited. She walked back to her seat with her shoulders back and standing tall. The words that I had just said transformed her into this REALLY big girl!

After dinner, I had her sit up on the counter so I could really take a good look at this new tooth. I looked at it again, said "Wow!" and gave her a big hug and then set her down as she exclaimed, "You are kidding me! I am so excited...I think that I am going to CRY!" She buried her head in her hands for a moment and then looked up with her watery eyes and then ran to go take a bath with a definite skip in her step.

How fun to see her have this kind of excitement over something that I would normally take for granted! I sometimes wish that I could see the world and experiences through the eyes of a child. It is much more exciting and perfect. She has the sweet innocence and the simple ability to make something so small make a world of difference in her night and ultimately make a world of difference in mine. Ah, the power of a new tooth!

These are a few of my favorite things!

I have noticed lately, that there are some things in my life that really make me smile. Little things....that melt my heart and lift my spirits. They make me think that they are God's little ways of letting me know that He is near. These are a few of my favorite things.......

Lately, in the mornings, Ally has been getting up earlier and coming downstairs. It is funny how I always wake up to hear her feet "padding" down the hallway BEFORE she makes it into our room. It is like our hearts are listening to one another and are perfectly in tune. This has become one of my favorite parts of the day and for those of you who really know me, you know I am not a morning person. So for this to be one of my favorite times of the day is amazing. She comes to the side of my bed. "Can I lay with you a widdle-bit." she says sleepily. She sounds so innocent and precious and perfect, how could I say no. I pull the covers back and she climbs in, immediately snuggling into the crook of my arm as we lay on our sides. Only God could make her fit so perfectly there. We fall back asleep every time and for about thirty more minutes, I am in the most perfect place (on earth!)

The other evening as I was checking on the girls, I went into Maddie's room and she was completely flopped over in her bed. She looked really uncomfortable. I picked her up and held her in my lap and whispered "Are you o.k. Maddie?" I didn't expect a response, so when I heard a very quiet "Yes, Ma'am." I smiled. Even in her sleep she used her manners, my sweet baby. I told her that I was turning off her Christmas lights before I left which she would normally balk at but this time she said another perfect "Yes, Ma'am." I have tucked this moment away in my heart as one of my favorite things. Maddie has been really using her manners without prompting and again, only God could be involved in something like this. :-) I know that He used that surprise in the middle of the night as a way to make me notice how well she has been doing.

My incredible husband got us all golf clubs for Christmas, the girls included. It is his sweet way of making sure we spend time as a family doing something that we all enjoy. We all went this morning to hit some balls and we had the best time aside from Brian being hit in the knee with a club by Ally. Poor Ally was so upset that she had hurt her Daddy, that she was crying when he should have been crying. :-) I couldn't help but smile. Ally was crying in my arms, Brian was biting his lip to keep from crying, Maddie was studiously hitting balls oblivious to the crying, I wanted to be hitting balls instead of listening to the crying...It still makes me smile to think about it all.

After the unfortunate golfing "incident", I was watching my family as they hit balls and laughed and smiled and I knew that this was one of my favorite things....spending time with them, the laughter AND the tears. It all goes hand in hand and that is what makes it perfect. It feels good to know that God has put us here together and there is no other place that I would rather be than with them, in these perfect moments that God has created for us. These moments are engraved in my heart as a few of my favorite things.