Which Way to Go...

It has taken me a week to get my thoughts together and even then I don't know that they are.... There is so much to feel and think and remember that is it almost overwhelming. And there are so many "shapes" that this story can take....which way to go, which way to go....

I will start at the end because that is where we all came together. Sunday night the 19th, one week after the incident we all came to watch Paul, Brian's father give his testimony of what had happened the week before. When I say "we all" I mean, Paul and Charlotte and all of the "kids", Brian and I, Josh and Amy and all the girls. It was in one word, amazing and the tears came; finally some release to all of this. As Paul recounted his memories, I was sitting besides my mother-in-love in her church and with my precious sleeping baby in my arms, crying these tears of, as Paul said in his testimony, "so many things"....tears of happiness that my dear "Baba" is still here in my life, tears of amazement at just hearing the story told by the one who holds Charlotte's heart, tears of joy that my Lord had made his presence known during all of this, tears of triumph that this was all for a reason, for His glory- Amen, tears of love for all of those that I adore and couldn't imagine losing....

On Sunday morning, July 12th, my sweet Charlotte, went in to cardiac arrest at her home in Tom Bean, Tx. My husband received the call from his dad that his mother was being taken to the hospital via the ambulance with chest pains. Oddly enough, there was no panic, no tears- just words and prayers... God was in control...we waited, can you believe it?!?!? Almost as though, we knew that it was OK, but even then we waited to hear some news. She was in surgery and that was when we headed up. The prayers were coming, the visitors were there to offer support as Charlotte battled her way "beautifully" through ICU. Paul took Charlotte home from the hospital on their 37th wedding anniversary, July 15th and she is doing great. Ultimately, Charlotte went through something that should have taken her life on so many levels. But the circumstances, the friends that were there to lend a hand, the timing of it all...EVERYTHING...the Lord our God had his hands on this family and I will continue to thank Him for that. There is a song by Casting Crowns that touches my heart every time I hear it and I wanted to share it. Read the word carefully, it will touch you- then buy the CD~ :-)

Praise you in this Storm

God you would have reached down
And wiped our tears away
Stepped in and saved the day
But once again, I say “Amen”, and it’s still raining

As the thunder rolls
I barely hear Your whisper through the rain
“I’m with you”
And as You mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away

I’ll praise You in this storm
And I will life my hands
For You are who You are
No matter where I am
Every tear I’ve cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm

I remember when
I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry
You raised me up again
My strength is almost gone
How can I carry on
If I can’t find You

As the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
“I’m with you”
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away

I lift my eyes unto the hills
Where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord
The Maker of Heaven and Earth


God wants to raise us up, God is real, He is here, He never leaves, He wants all of us to believe and be with Him in heaven.....the way to go is.....UP!