Time Flies

Written: 11/15/07, Dallas, TX

Wow, time flies when you are having fun! I can't believe that it has been this long since I have sat down and taken a peek into my heart.

From Natalie's birthday and getting to know her, to an incredibly romantic trip to San Antonio with Brian, to event filled weekends, and planning for the girls birthdays and the Holidays, the fall months have escaped me. It all went by in the blink of an eye. This time of year always does this to me or rather I do it to myself. But it has been fun.

I can't believe how time has flown since the girls were born. Maddie will be FIVE on the 20th and Ally will be THREE in December. It seems that the older the girls get the more fun we have been having with them. There is just so much to experience with each day they grow. They are growing into themselves and it has been incredible to watch. Ally has started to out grow her tantrums although she is still my sensitive girl. And Maddie is such a big girl and the things she says are so grown up. It makes me wonder exactly when my little girls grew up......it so gradual yet so fast. Was it when Maddie started riding her bike with out training wheels? Or when Ally started to spell her name? Or when they started to really play together instead of fighting over the toys? I know I can't pin point the time but it helps me to remember all that has happened in the last year and how thankful I am to have experienced all the good AND the bad.

Written: Thanksgiving Night, Abilene, TX

I started this blog about a week ago and never found the time to finish it....and here I am now on Thanksgiving night, my blood pressure is high and I am feeling defeated, for now. Don't get me wrong, the trip to see my parents and siblings and nieces has been WONDERFUL, but my sweet Ally has been wearing me down. She has had tantrums and crying fits every day and I am tired. I am running out of options and have been waiting for her to out grow them....and I thought she had. It has been hard to think you are making progress and then to end up back where you started. Maybe it is the new environment or maybe she is just having a bad week. Whatever it is, my patience is growing thin and I am not sure what to do. Right now, I need to STOP time and just be still. I know that God doesn't give you what you cannot handle, but I am so curious as to what God has in mind for us....

Dear God,
Help me to be the mother that Ally needs, all the time. Give me the patience and wisdom to help Ally with her tantrums. You have blessed me with these incredible children, who are little parts of me and I thank You with all of my heart. Help me to know what to do next and what road to take. You are almighty and nothing is done without You. Give me peace and turn my eyes to You. Amen.

While I have been writing this, time HAS stopped, I am still and I am better....

Happy Birthday, Natalie!

God has blessed us with a new little life. And it brings tears to my eyes, as well as thoughts of adding another one of these precious little ones to our clan. Yikes! I have baby-fever! If anyone knows of something I can "take" for this "fever", please call me. I thought that going through another round of terrible two's would be the cure but even now that is NOT working.... :-)(I LOVE you Ally!)

Josh and Amy's daughter, Natalie Ann Cheek made her arrival into the world this morning at 7:33 a.m. and she is amazing. Her little toes and fingers are perfect. Her little nose is perfect and SHE is perfect. And I just want to hold her all the time. It makes me think how little time I was able to spend with Ella as a baby because I had my sweet little Ally to take care of. And how little time I was able to spend with my other neices, Jesse and Elin, because I was too scared and young to really know what to do. I feel like this time, with Natalie, will be so precious to me. I am looking forward to getting to know her "quirks" as well as seeing Ella and my girls merge their lives with hers. What an exciting time for all of us! Thank you God, for bringing Natalie safely to us and for blessing us with such precious children. They are all so special!

Happy Birthday, sweet Natalie! We can't wait to get to know you!

My Broken Heart

My heart was broken....

I had to take Ally to the ER Sunday night. If you have ever taken your child to the ER then you know what I am talking about....your heart aches, your stomach is turning and you know that this will get worse before it gets better.

Last Sunday night, before bed, Ally was lying on the floor and reached her hand up for me to take and help her up to her feet. Well, I did and she dislocated her elbow. Can you see now why me heart was broken??? I felt TERRIBLE, actually I felt more than terrible! (But I am proud that I didn't burst into tears.) Ally, of course, cried and screamed "owee" and held her arm close to her body. When she wouldn't move it, we knew that something was really wrong. And to the ER we went....

The ER doctor assured me that it was common and actually showed me how to pop it back in, because it would probably happen again. (Please pray NOW that Ally will be the exception!!!) Four HOURS after arriving at the ER, we were on our way back home and didn't get to bed until 2:00 a.m. My brain was fried and my heart ached. As tired as I was, I kept replaying the events of the night over and over....

The next morning before I took Ally to the pediatrician to check her arm, I saw Kitty (Amy to some of you) my sister-in-law, as I was dropping Maddie off at school. She has no idea of what had happened the night before. There is something about looking into the eyes of someone you love and someone who knows you so well and telling them something that has broken your heart. I cried...for the first time since our ER visit. I have a problem, one that I admit, of bottling up all of my emotions until it becomes too much for me. But for some wonderful reason, Kitty helps to me release those emotions and to feel "free" from them. Thank you, Kitty for being there and for being unaware of what you did for me that morning when I was feeling so low.

I know that I have said this before...but family and friends, those who know you to your core are so amazing and so special. I don't want to ever take these relationships for granted. I can only pray that God guards these people close to his heart. They are amazing and a blessing from Him.

My heart was broken...but it is not anymore.

Watch What You Say!

:-)Watch what you say.....

I picked Ally up from school last week and noticed that the clothes she had worn to school that day were hanging on her hook in a plastic bag...always a bad sign. She had an accident, which is unusual for her. The story goes like this......

Ella, Ally's cousin, has been having a few potty accidents. So in order to "motivate" her, her mommy and daddy have been sending candy as a treat if she goes on the potty. Well, Ally saw Ella getting some candy after she went potty and Ally asks her teacher, "If I go potty, can I have candy?" Miss Christie answers, "No Ally, Ella gets candy because she has accidents." (Can you see where this is going?!?!?)

Ally takes Miss Christie's comment literally! A little while later, Ally walks into the bathroom and then comes out with a big smile on her face. "Miss Christie, I had an ACCIDENT.....I can have CANDY!" she exclaimed proudly!

While Ally may give me grief at times, with her tantrums, she also brightens my day with stories like this one. She IS a mess and I LOVE it. So, the moral of the story is....watch what you say, Ally might be listening!

Botox?!?!

Who needs Botox?!?!?

As a treat for being good, the girls got some new lip gloss yesterday. They were beyond excited. You can never go wrong with makeup! But, it was inevitable what would happen.....

After applying and re-applying again and again, my sweet little girls looked like that had just had a session of Botox! They walked into the room with their lips sticking out and what seemed to be an inch or two worth of shiny gloss on their lips. They were so proud! Who knew that excessive gloss was all you needed to have those beautiful, full lips we all want?!?!

Bye, bye needles!

What IS that??

Last night, the girls and I came upon something that made us dance on our toes.....What IS that??? I said! The girls were scattering to the far corners of the room while I went closer to inspect....

What is it? the girls screamed again and again, unsure of how to feel. I still wasn't sure; it moved so fast. Then I could see. We had a funny, little visitor in our house. A gecko! "I LIKE Gecko's" my silly Ally exclaimed! "Me too, they are funny." I countered. I sent Maddie to get a cup so we could catch the little guy. Well, you can imagine the sight of us all "dancing" around trying to "save" this Gecko from the perils of our house, after all, we do have a cat! We finally caught him in the cup and the girls were just dying with laughter and anticipation of seeing our unexpected visitor close up. There is SO much excitement in catching a Gecko.

Daddy called soon after and Ally got on the phone and told him what we had caught......"Daddy, I caught a TACO" she said. Maddie and I giggled until we had tears in our eyes while Daddy tried to figure it out.....

What is that?? A GECKO!

Songs and Hugs

I was putting the girls to bed the other night and they were BOTH being very sweet. Here are the stories....

Normally, when I put Ally to bed, we pick out two books to read, say our prayers and then Ally will ask for me to sing her favorite song, "Lord you are" while I pat/tickle her back. (Lord you are more precious than silver, Lord you are more costly than gold, Lord you are more beautiful than diamonds and nothing I desire compares to you.)Well, this night was different. SHE wanted to sing this time. She sang "Jesus loves me" and "Lord you are." It was so precious to hear her little voice quietly sing these songs. It melted my heart and made my night. What could be better than this?!?!?.......

After putting Ally to bed, I was ready for Maddie who was waiting for me in her room. We read another book and she said her prayers on her own. She said "Thank you for Mommy and Daddy, Maddie and Ally, thank you for everyone AND thank you God for who you are. Amen" I look forward to her prayers every night. It is my favorite part of the day. There is always something so sweet about the way she prays and loves God. After her prayer, we were talking and she asked me if she hugged herself, if God would feel it.....Yes! He would! So she hugged herself so tight and then we said our goodnights.

I LOVE the way children think. Their child-like innocence can be so profound. There are many times that I forget to "sing" to God like Ally and many more times that I forget to "hug" God like Maddie. Thank you girls for teaching me as I teach you!

Thankful

I am thankful for my life, my girls, my husband, my family and most of all my Lord who has blessed me with all of these things. My life is full and I need to remember this every moment that I breathe. I was reading an article last night, and I will spare you the appalling details, of the horrors going on in the Congo....Bukavu, to be specific. The disregard for human life, and most of all the disregard for God, is nauseating. I had to stop reading because the stories were amazingly heart-wrenching, agonizing and almost completely unbelievable. (Not exactly the best bed time story.) I keep wondering, how could this be happening in TODAY's world???? It just doesn't seem possible. It reminds me of a blog that my friend, Carol, wrote recently about a book called A Thousand Splendid Sun's , a book about the horrors in yet another nation. There is so much hostility, sorrow and fear going on across the globe and it helps me to realize what an unbelievable life I am living...that my family is living. And also helps me realize that I need to pray more, not for myself but for others. I am thankful for this country and for the freedom with which we are so blessed. It is amazing to me to think of such chaos going on just across the ocean. These people, living in th Congo have no sense of the security and freedom that we so easily take for granted. My prayers were earnest last night for no one in particular, but just for the pain and tears of those less fortunate in a country that is falling apart around them. My prayers turned to my girls who I pray will never feel such pain and never cry such heart-breaking tears. I am thankful for the privilege to pray, for the need to teach my children to pray, and I am thankful for a God who listens. I am so THANKFUL.............

Is the Grass Greener?

My brain has been working overtime..... I find that I have been "comparing" my parenting style to other's parenting styles and my kids to other's kids. You get the picture. And I am second guessing myself on how I am potentially "molding" my girls and what women they will become. Am I doing the right thing? Am I being too hard on them? Am I too soft on them? (Do all mother's go through this?) The answers can be hard to find. No child is perfect, I know that, but sometimes the grass looks a little bit greener right over that hill! :-) I have found that it can be hard to distinguish between children being children and defiant behavior. When I call Maddie and she doesn't come, is she too wrapped up in what ever her brain is doing to really hear me or is she being a "turkey" and not coming because she doesn't want to? The other day I was trying to get Maddie and Ally up the stairs to take a bath. Maddie was already on her way but Ally was lagging behind. "Ally! Let's go!" I said in a "not so quiet" voice. Maddie pipes up, "Mom, she is coming, she is just slow!" Well, there you go. She is just being a child. I start thinking.....how many times do I get onto them for being a child? Probably too many. I want to make sure that I teach them the values and morals that I deeply believe in but I want to make sure that I let them enjoy just being a kid. I don't want to teach them to rush through each day. Life is too short to let these moments pass by. Maddie and Ally are incredible little girls. And I know that God has his hand on them and who they will become. I will stop comparing and second guessing and start enjoying these amazing children that are growing up before my very own eyes. The grass on THIS side of the hill is just right!

"Family Vacation"

Okay, where do I start..........I feel like there are so many stories to share. We just got back from our week long family vacation to Galveston with Brian's family. We had an amazing time. The girls did great on the way down, for FIVE hours. I didn't even hear a peep. Oh, right..........I guess that was because I wasn't in the same car as those little hoodlums! I am not sure how we lucked out on that one........probably because we have some amazing husbands, but Amy and I rode with Poppy and Baba (Brian's parents) in a separate car. We were able to sleep the day away!!! Yea! We were there in no time, although if you ask Brian and Josh it may be a different story! :-)


We arrived at the beach house and it looked incredible! Maddie ran up the stairs to explore, as did the rest of us. Because she was younger and faster...she reached the top floor in lightening speed and seemed to be "drawn" to her room. She called to me...."Mom!!! Come here!" I ran up the second flight of stairs where Maddie was waiting for me with a huge smile on her face. "Mom, it is the room that I have always wanted!!" she said as I came up the stairs. Hearing this from a four year old made me laugh. I walked in and what do you think I saw............for those who know Maddie really well, I imagine you can guess.........PINK!!! The room was adorable. Bathed in pink and flowers, the girls were in heaven! There were two twin bed and a bunk bed which the girls thought was so cool. They were so excited and it was a great way to start the vacation........other than the five hour nap I had on the way there- wink, wink!

My second story is about Ally. As you all know, she has been somewhat challenging with her tantrums.....well, during the trip she did really well. There was only one time that I had to remove her from her surroundings. All was well. One morning, after breakfast as I was wiping down the kitchen table, Ally was climbing on the chairs just "hanging out" and she asked me....."Mom, do you like tantrums??"- plain as day............ it made me laugh, because she has been so good.....I was trying to think, what made her think of this. Their minds are so amazing. I told her, "No, baby, I don't like tantrums ." Then she asked.........."Do you like CAKE??" With this question, I really laughed. "Yes, I LOVE cake!" I responded. From then on she has been asking me what I like and it has been precious. Do I like snakes, grasshoppers, ladybugs, whining, pink.....everything that little girls can imagine and more. I love that she can think about these thing with out prompting. Her brain is constantly going and I know that we are making progress on the whole tantrum issue. For instance, she went into Sunday School without any problems this morning, which is a huge deal after a week and more of having Mommy and Daddy all to herself. I even got a kiss and hug AFTER she already went in. It was so nice. I relished in it for a moment. The little things make such a difference. I had a skip in my step for the whole day!

Family Vacation- a time to spend with family and enjoy all there is to enjoy about one another. This is my definition of "Family Vacation." I am a huge believer in family vacations. They can bring out all the good and bad, but as long as you are with family it makes no difference. They love no matter what....even when a certain someone (for those that can't guess...my sweet Ally) throws a tantrum because they wanted mommy to open the door and no one else. Silly I know, but it happened. These things fall by the way side because it is family. We had an amazing time; it is something that I will never forget. (Well, how can I.... I have 300 pictures to sort through from the trip- YIKES! )

The Power of Hugs

This summer has begun! The girls stayed with my parents for a week while we went to our national sales meeting in Austin. I was of course anxious, as any mother would be, about leaving them for so long but I was grateful and excited for some time away with Brian.

The trip was wonderful. I slept in and enjoyed some time by the pool. It was my cup of tea!!! (I hope I wasn't suppose to go to any meetings!:-)) Oh, and Brian and I spent some time together driving through the Hill Country and "exploring" on our way to Austin. I recommend a "road trip" with your spouse with out any type of plan. We drove through the beautiful stormy weather without knowing where we would stop for the night.......the unexpected with someone you love can be so amazing. Try it, you never know what will happen!

At the end of the week, we arrived to pick up the girls without a hitch and they were excited to see us. On the way home, they told us about all the adventures they had with their cousins at Grandma and PeaPa's house. I asked them what their favorite thing was that they did while staying with Grandma and PeaPa......and Ally's response was so sweet......."The hugs!" she said. Of all the fun things that they did, Ally remembered the hugs. This is what is so amazing about the "power of a hug".....it meant more to her than going to Chucky Cheese, WOW! :-)

It was so nice to hear something so sweet about their time away from us. They were loved so much and it feels wonderful. Brian and I are so lucky to have an amazing family, on both sides, that will love our children as much as we do. This is a reminder for me how important it is to make the time to hug and kiss and tickle and LOVE every second we can. They will remember every moment!(And so will we!)

An Innocent Prayer

Tonight has been hard.

Brian is out of town and the girls have been a mess. I am on my last nerve and have had a "not so mother of the year" night. I know that all mothers go through this but tonight seems harder. It is not all roses, right?!?!? I tip my hat to single mothers who have no one to "relieve" them.....they are incredible. I have been thinking....is there something that I need to do better to prevent nights like these.....

My answer came while putting Maddie to bed. This was her prayer:

Dear God,
Thank you for everything. Let us have a very good, good, good, day. Thank you for helping us watch a movie. (I ordered one on pay-per-view that she loved. :-)) And I know that you are always here. I love you. Amen.

The part that hit home in a very innocent way were her words...."And I know that you are always HERE." The night that I had tonight was all me. I did not rely on God for help but instead did it all on my own. I know in my heart that God is always here but did not acknowledge it. If I had, I might have handled these struggles better.

I had a hard night but tomorrow will be better. My answer came in Maddie's innocent prayer.

Cue the Tears

Brian, being the thoughtful dad that he is, got the girls a new movie. It is about a girl and her horse, a sweet Disney movie. You may be thinking what I am thinking...uh-oh a Disney movie. It seems that all Disney movies are tear jerkers. Why IS that?!?!? We put the movie in and went on to do chores around the house before putting the girls to bed. As the evening continues and Ally has already been put to bed, I see a little blond flash out of the corner of my eye. I look and she is gone but I hear.....sniffling. Is she crying? I go into the room and find Maddie SOBBING in front of her movie. The tears were just streaming down her face. Her heart was breaking over this horse. "Baby, what is wrong?" I asked. "This movie makes me sad." she cries to me. Cue the tears. My eyes start watering. I should have known....that darn Disney movie. Brian and I rewound the movie to the "sad part" where the poor horse gets hurt.We watched it with her and consoled her explaining that it is just a movie and sometimes sad things happen. Well, the movie got better and the horse "pulled through." :-)Maddie was no longer upset.

The lesson I learned from this, other than never leave her alone with a Disney movie :-), is how much I want to protect her from ever having her heart broken. Seeing her sobbing made me want to "hide" her from the world; keep her in a safe place at least till she is thirty. Obviously, that is not realistic but my overprotectiveness is kicking in. I remember calling my mother "overprotective" in a bad way. As a teenager..."Geez, my mom is SO overprotective!" Now I KNOW in my heart how right she was to be just that. (Music to mother's ears, I am sure.)I won't mind being called an over protective mom, at all. Bring it on!

Oh, and don't worry if you do not see Maddie for the next twenty-five years......

My heart will never be the same.....

Something happened to me the other day that I hope every mother will experience......

Ally and I had just come back from a walk, some bonding time together while Maddie and Daddy were away, and she wanted to ride Maddie's bike. As you can imagine...Maddie's bike is way too big for her. She sat on it and then it was time to go inside. Well, Ally didn't want to go in! In my rush to get things moving, I scooped her up and in we went. Ally's eyes turned red and the tears welled and then the "pterodactyl" came out. ("Pterodactyl" is the nick name for Ally's incredible ability to make a noise that is similar to that of an enraged dinosaur!)"Me do it!!!!" she screamed at the TOP of her lungs. Then the drama unfolded. She layed flat on the ground and there was no reasoning with her. (Did I mention that she is two????) I was at my limit with her tantrums. (This seems to be her thing lately.....did I mention that she is two!) I walked out of the room and left her in her in her misery. I sat on the sofa and waited.....and waited. It was not long until the screaming stopped and the crying was no longer. Instead I could hear her little feet coming towards me.............Our eyes connected and we stared for a while, waiting each other out......she was the first to speak.... "Mommy, are you upset with me?" she asked. My heart swelled. "I'm sorry." She says. She KNOWS what she has done! She had crossed the line and she KNOWS!

As much as I dislike her tantrums, I love her spirit. She is an amazing little girl that is so in tune with the world around her. It is hard to remember how fast they grow and learn. She is not my baby anymore. Of course, we made up and had our little talk about how we act and no crying and no tantrums, ect. ect. But the best part of the evening was knowing that she wanted to make up on her OWN. I will ALWAYS remember this incredible moment and I pray that every mother will experience something similar. My heart will never be the same.....

My Prayer

Every day I see a part of Brian and I in the girls. We are truly "living on" in these two precious little beings. They are made of all of our good traits and bad traits, mixed in with the characteristics of who they will become as an individual. Maddie is my little "drama queen", full of all things frilly and PINK and she is so hard headed that it will make your blood boil.;-) And Ally is my little "tough girl" who is so sensitive at the same time. They are growing so fast and they are being molded into the women that they will so quickly become. I sometimes wonder how I will survive raising two girls.....I pray that they will learn from us how to be Godly in all they do and to follow their dreams, whatever they may be. There is NOTHING that can stop them. These two lives are in our hands and there is no other place that I would rather be than here with my girls and with a husband that wants the same things for them as I do. There is no better life than the one that I am living.......I am blessed.

The Beginning

I am a first timer at this and I am excited. I have never been an outspoken person and I have been intrigued by the thought of WRITING down my thoughts and feelings along with the funny and out of control moments that are created by my girls. Wouldn't they want to know the funny antics they pulled as children....the funny things they said and did....the way they brightened my life as well as made me pull my hair out? They are my life in a nut shell. They are full of fun, never stopping to just stop, they are always on the go and always moving on to the next adventure. The energy is mind- boggling. They need to bottle this stuff! I wanted to have a place to write down all the adventures as they come about, so here goes. Stay tune for the fun.....this will be a WILD ride.